Lose the Guilt: The Power of Creating Your Own Morning Routine

I’m not a morning person. By any stretch of the imagination. My magical working hours—where I feel my brain is firing on all cylinders and the creative juices are flowing—is from 10pm to 2am. (That’s when the majority of my doctoral dissertation was written.) And then the next morning, I’d wake up, after a solid eight hours of sleep, of course, energized and ready to take on another day.

Carey Nieuwhof, bestselling leadership author, in his book, At Your Best: How to get Time, Energy, and Priorities Working in Your Favor, challenges us to consider our energies throughout the day and when we are at our most productive. How do we sync our natural tendencies to be most productive with our time? Great in theory, but not always practical. Unfortunately, my late night/early morning time frame really doesn’t fit in with how most of the world operates.

For years, I felt guilty that I didn’t have a perfectly refined morning routine established starting at 4am. From the information I was consuming, I was only going to be successful if I did. Hourly planner that starts the day at 4am? Check. Drinking eight ounces of cold water immediately upon waking? Check. Workout? Check. Meditation/Prayer time? Check. Writing in a gratitude journal? Check. Perfectly prepared Instagram worthy breakfast? Check. I was doing everything I was “supposed” to be doing.

In the fast-paced world of career-driven women, the concept of a rigid morning routine often looms large. We're bombarded with advice from successful people who swear by their early wake-up calls, intense workout sessions, meditation practices, and meticulously planned mornings.

According to the experts, making your bed is supposed to set you up for productivity and success. My experience? I did it for 30 days and sensed no difference. In fact, I was more annoyed about the time I spent completing the task first thing. Drinking eight ounces immediately? I felt terrible and water-logged. My hydration throughout the entire day was more than adequate, and I was going to be just fine without that cup of water.

These things might sound wonderful in theory, but it’s not realistic for everyone. It seems like there’s a prescribed formula for success, and deviating from it can invoke feelings of guilt and shame. We may even feel inadequate if we don’t adhere to them.

Here’s a thought: Having a rigid morning routine is overrated.

Let’s face it, we’re not all the same. Each one of us has a unique set of circumstances, responsibilities, and energy levels. What works wonders for one person might not resonate with another. Women, especially, have unique challenges juggling career, family, and personal aspirations. The pressure to fit into someone else’s routine can lead to burnout and self-doubt.

The truth is, a morning routine should not be a source of guilt or shame. It should be a source of empowerment and motivation, a tool that helps us start our day feeling refreshed, focused, and ready to tackle our goals. It's time to break free from the comparison game and embrace the power of creating our own morning rituals that align with our individual needs and aspirations.

Instead of trying to fit ourselves into a predetermined mold, we should empower ourselves to create morning routines that suit our lifestyles, energy levels, and goals. Empowerment comes from recognizing that there is no one-size-fits-all approach to a productive morning. It's about understanding our bodies and minds, acknowledging our limitations, and embracing our unique circumstances.

Creating Your Own Morning Routine

1.     Take Stock: Take some time to understand your body's natural rhythm. Are you a morning person or a night owl? When possible, structure your routine around your peak energy levels or as close to them as possible.

2.     Set Realistic Goals: Instead of overwhelming yourself with an extensive list of tasks, set a few realistic goals for your morning. Whether it’s a quick workout, a moment of mindfulness, or a leisurely breakfast, prioritize what truly matters to you.

3.     Be Flexible: Life is unpredictable, and some mornings you might need more rest or have unexpected responsibilities. Be flexible with your routine. It's okay to skip a workout or meditative practice if your body is telling you it needs rest.

4.     Incorporate Joy: Infuse your morning with activities that bring you joy. It could be listening to music, reading a few pages of a book, or spending quality time with your loved ones. Joy fuels motivation and sets a positive tone for the day.

5.     Be Mindful: Be present in whatever you do. Whether you’re sipping your coffee, taking a shower, or stretching, be fully engaged in the moment. Mindfulness enhances your overall well-being and helps you approach your day with clarity.

6.     Embracing the Season You're In: Every season of life brings different challenges and opportunities. A morning routine that worked for you in your 20s might not be feasible in your 30s or 40s, especially if you're juggling a demanding career, family responsibilities, or pursuing further education. Embrace the season you’re in and craft a morning routine that aligns with your current reality.

For years, I felt that I was failing at a morning routine. I just needed more discipline. More perseverance. More something. But, recently, after coming off of a nearly six-week sabbatical, a time in which I was able to naturally create new rhythms, I realized that I was just trying to force my mornings into a mold that wasn’t working for me.

I’ve now found new rhythms, rhythms that have set me up for greater success throughout the day. My mornings still include a healthy breakfast, workouts, and prayer, but not necessarily in that order. For someone who’s not a morning person, jumping right into a task which was supposed to contribute positively to my overall functioning (e.g., a workout, prayer time), just wasn’t working because my neurons weren’t yet fully firing. When I first wake up, I complete mindless tasks, e.g., emptying the dishwasher or doing laundry, in order to be productive but yet also give my brain time to wake up. That way, by the time I get to my workout or prayer time, I’m more present, and the time is more fruitful.

In the journey toward success, it's essential to recognize that your worth is not determined by the intricacy of your morning routine. True empowerment comes from identifying how you operate best and then creating a plan to meet those needs. So, let go of the guilt and shame associated with not adhering to a rigid morning routine. Instead, focus on creating a morning ritual that nurtures your mind, body, and spirit, and sets a positive tone for the day ahead.

Remember, your power lies in your authenticity. Embrace your individuality, craft a morning routine that works for you, and step into each day with confidence, knowing that you are enough, even if your morning routine totally blew up that morning.

Be free,

Lani

P.S. Looking for a mental reset to help propel you in the right direction? Check out this 5 Day Plan.